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Planning Ahead
I’ve mentioned that pre-scan anxiety, the blend of hope and fear. There’s also, I’ve discovered, a post-scan funk. I’ve been trying to figure out how to describe it and how to allow myself to work...
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Knitty McKnitterson
I have about 4 knitting projects that are sitting half finished, waiting patiently for me to be inspired to pick them up again and see them through to completion. I have about 3 more projects sitting...
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Waiting For My Toxins
Assuming my platelets are cooperating, I’ll start my next round of chemo tomorrow. I, being forgetful (or a master procrastinator), waited until the last minute to order my refills. My particular brand...
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All That Waiting For Nothing
Today was my pre-chemo appointment with my neuro-oncologist (NO). These appointments start with a trip to the lab to see the vampires and pee in a cup. With luck, we know my platelet count before or...
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The Silver Lining
I know this will seem like a contradiction (you know, since I like planning ahead), but sometimes I need to find the silver lining and just go with the flow. Since I’m not starting my chemo this week:...
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Tears Required
I don’t feel sad, I just feel like I need a good cry. Sometimes you just need a good cry. Must find the Hallmark channel… This week has been incredibly emotional. Yes, there’s my own crap going on, but...
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Human Pincushion
There are very few joys in being a human pincushion. I get my blood drawn at LEAST twice a month and have an IV line placed every 6…8…wait…now 12 weeks. I’ve never been afraid of needles – except for...
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Friday Morning Feelings
Feeling really glad I didn’t book a flight for first thing in the morning. My beautiful daughter and I are sitting around the table eating breakfast, playing Fashion Story, waiting for the dryer to be...
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What I Learned in Arizona
My daughter and I took a little weekend trip to visit cousins in Arizona. We had a great time and can’t wait for another visit! We (ok, maybe just me) learned a few things while we were there: 1....
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Living Through Chemistry
I know the phrase is ‘better living through chemistry.’ In my case, it’s just ‘living through chemistry’ since my chemistry-in-pill-form just may be the thing that’s keeping me alive…and driving…and...
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The Dreaded Lunchbox
I know I’m not alone in this…I’ve heard some of you moms/dads express your joy at the end of the school year. Making interesting, healthy lunches every day all school year long is EXHAUSTING!...
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Mortality vs. Invincibility
It’s a part of the roller-coaster ride of brain cancer…feeling your mortality vividly in every cell of your body one day and then completely forgetting you’re fighting a likely deadly illness the next....
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Day 5 – New Dosage
Well, here we are on day 5 of my new lower dose of Temodar. I’ve survived to fight another day. I’ve had only moments of nausea. I stayed on top of my anti-nausea meds, but it’s not clear how badly I...
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Thank Dog You’re Here!
So…we got a dog. My husband finally gave in to the pressure. I think he secretly really wanted a dog though because he gave in pretty quickly once it was three against one and we pleaded and begged and...
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Wishes For My Daughter
My daughter turned 10 years old this week. It feels like a big milestone, she’s more independent, more mature, more attitude-prone. I’d really like to be around for the next decade, or two, or three of...
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OMG! IT’S SO ITCHY!!
No, I haven’t contracted something scandalous. I got my vaccine shots today (or at least my shots of what we hope is the vaccine – still a double-blind study). The nurse argued with me about the...
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New Life
We had a wild game of tree trimming on our block this week. Here are the rules: One neighbor decides to trim their trees and calls a bunch of tree guys to get quotes. She tells us who she selected...
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The Same, But Different – United We Stand With Our Tumors
When I was first diagnosed with brain cancer, lots of people suggested support groups. I cringed at the idea (based on my own avoidance of ‘joining’, rather than personal negative experience). But as I...
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My Stupid Platelets
Well, my bone marrow hates me. It’s official. I had my pre-chemo appointment today – saw the vampires, peed in a cup, met with my oncologist. My platelets are at 98…2 frickin’ ‘whatevers’ off the...
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Dog Days Of Summer
We’ve had a dog for a little over 3 weeks. Here are some highlights of our experience so far. Dogs are hairy and they shed. Our brown couch is sad. Dogs poo. Dog food is kind of stinky. Our dog likes...
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